Through the dark valley......
#1
Posted 30 April 2013 - 04:03 PM
I am discouraged that I cannot get myself interested in the myriad of old Christian Classics and a case full of books and study guides, and two Bibles beside my sitting place....three if ya count the latest Version (International Standard Version) downloaded into my Kindle, which also has about a hundred good books loaded into it. It's not just Christian reading. I cannot even get into my latest Kindle edition of Mark Twains Complete Works.
I'm bumfuzzled. LOL. I am heeading out to jump on my zero-turn Husky mower and finish the 6 acre lot. I have a big old garden spot ploughed up so I will busy myself with that. But sisters and brothers.....please pray for me right now if you please. I have a sneaking suspicion that I am under some kind of attack or bondage or something. My faith in God is secure. I know that He hasn't left me. But it would sure help if he was to send me word that He has got his EYE on me right now. Sorry for the bummer thread but this is part of growing isn't it???Growing into the deeper life?? Well maybe it is....maybe it isn't. But life has lost it's zest for a season for sure. Oh I feel good for a minute when I go tend to my mother....but even THAT doens't seem to break-through anymore. Just bum-tuckered out. Peace. Kevin
#2
Posted 01 May 2013 - 12:02 AM
I am wondering if you are too isolated? Like myself I view you as an introvert which is fine but we still need other believers with a deep connection to really see the love and power of Christ working through us. I started attending a weekly women's bible study and it's helped me tremendously. The Lord gave us a desire to want to share. Perhaps my picture of you is wrong, please forgive me if it is. I just know that you've had trouble finding a church in your area that fills your needs.
I'm also curious about your bible studies with Kiononia House. I've been listening to Chuck Missler tapes and have found him very enlightening.
To Him be the Glory, your sister, Betsy
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#3
Posted 01 May 2013 - 04:54 AM
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#4
Posted 01 May 2013 - 05:54 AM
Then, we have a multitude of Baptist and Chuches of Christ in my area. Of course, there are many doctrinal issues with the Church of Christ that I differ with, even to the point of saying "Not if they were the last group on earth!!!". And then, with the Southern Baptist churches in the area, and I have attended them all, ....all of their sermons are alliterated. Their song services are VERY much like a Gaither Homecoming with plenty of applause and the like....things I consider not fitting and proper for a Church. And by the time I get through typing all of this , I read it, and I see how I could be called: HYPER-critical. And that I am setting up a standard that no Church in my county meets, just so I can feel justified when I elect to stay at home. I have, in the past, used the valid excuse that I can find no one to sit with my mother on Sunday mornings and evenings, but now, Momma is actually quite content to sleep much of the day and she would never miss me for an hour and a half on Sunday mornings. And I am getting miserable enough to where I know no that if I don't find fellowship soon, things will worsen, and I will get desperate beyond belief, and then.....who knows.
Quite the quandary I find myslef in. What would y'all do if you coudn't find that church that comes close to believing like yourself. Although I am not a full blown, 5 point Calvinist, (as most Southern Baptist are), do I set that aside in the name of fellowship at all cost? I am willing to. Oh believe me, I am WILLING to. But I have developed my working creed over a few years of Bible reading and study of the old saints who, thankfully, left books for us to grow by. It's just plain as day. The Gospel that was preached in the 1800's and early 1900's is a far cry different than what is preached now.
Ya know, the ONLY church where I think they get it close to being right is the Mennonite (quite different from Amish) Brotherhood in my county. I have worshipped with them on numerous occasions. Their services last an exact 2 hours, with 2 sermons, some good old hymns, (although they don't use instruments, but I can live with that). I have been in MUCH prayer about this and it seems as if God simply will not give any definitive answers on this for me. Of course, I wish that he would say: "GO HERE!!!!!!" But.......well, it will be the very first verbal answer for any prayer if He answers like that.
But long story short, I have isolated long enough. I am going to do something about it. I have even prayed that God would use my house (really momma's house) since it's rather large for weekly fellowship/ Bible studies. You know, home church. I even have a piano here and a big room. I would gladly go to Lowes and buy a bunch of chairs. And I would definitely let some more seasoned Christian lead (for lack of a better word) the fledgling flock. Anyway, thanks to BOTH sisters for your feedback. They are equally valuable to me.
#5
Posted 01 May 2013 - 07:45 AM
I noticed a devotional from Tozer that speaks to your wanting direction from God about a church to attend. Tozer stated that God has already given us certain instructions.....some things he says we are to DO, some things he says we are NOT TO DO, and then those other things fall into a group that God leaves the choice up to us. As I understand it, the choices we make within that last group are ours, but God will make whatever choice we make the right one if we choose in love and submit our choice to him. Probably, if we are extremely honest, none of us believe EXACTLY all the doctrine of the church or denomination that we attend. We choose the group of believers with which we want to worship and the ones that believe have the most similar belief to ours. I will admit that not believing in the Trinity would be a hurdle for me but if that is the only difference you have with them, maybe fellowshipping with that church would be good for you. But only you can make that call.
It does seem to me that you need other believers with which to worship at this time. Maybe the group with which you worship now won`t be the group you are with at a later time, but gthe gathering together of a group of believers is important for all of us and does a lot toward strengthening our faith in the Lord. You may just have to agree to disagree about the Trinity. I have no doubt that you will find a group that worships like you desire, it just may take a while.
Your brother in Christ,
Charlie
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#6
Posted 01 May 2013 - 10:15 AM
Gareth
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#7 Guest_Marvin Harrell_*
Posted 01 May 2013 - 02:05 PM
#8
Posted 02 May 2013 - 06:22 AM
My perspective has returned. I will continue to "endure for a while" while God lovingly pares away all in me that is not good for me, or us, or Him. These replies, again, make me realize, that trying to walk the walk is only doable as a group and not as a lone straggler. "Give US thas day OUR daily bread....."
I suppose that my cross consist partly in my having to learn to enjoy being around people. I FULLY and COMPLETELY appreciate all of the replies. I pray that God will richly bless y'all today.!!!
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#9
Posted 03 May 2013 - 04:21 PM
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#10
Posted 04 May 2013 - 02:49 AM
Missler, Nancy (2012-09-04). The Way of Agape: Understanding God's Love (Kindle Locations 1069-1070). The King's High Way Ministries. Kindle Edition.
This I believe is why we need fellowship. Unconditional love glorifies God and proves He lives in us. It's the key to peace, joy, and contentment
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#11
Posted 04 May 2013 - 05:15 AM
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#12
Posted 04 May 2013 - 11:09 AM
I am praying for you, especially that your faith will not fail. Satan is certainly being allowed to test you as he did Peter. “Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith fail not: and when thou art converted (returned to your true self) strengthen thy brethren" .( Luke 22:31-32)
I have been where you are and understand what you are going through. Satan's biggest weapon is discouragement. I thought that since no church fit my standards of what a true church should be, I could be a "lone ranger Christian". My Pastor told me that was incorrect thinking, as we are members of Christ's Body and each beleiver has gifts and is needed in the Body to make it whole. "Not forsaking the assembling of yourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching" (Hebrews 10:25). Weekly church attendance is in no sense “required” for believers, but someone who belongs to Christ should have a desire to worship God, receive His Word, and fellowship with other believers. I see that you do desire fellowship from what you have written.
Once I became more mature in my faith and could rightly divide the Word of Truth, I was impressed that all my excuses about not finding the exact standards in a corperate fellowship could not hold up. I found myself coming to the conclusion (or being led by God?) that if I knew the truth, I was needed as a living epistle for other belieivers and found I was honor bound to go be a part of the body (strengthen the brethren). The "church" is not perfect, but full of imperfect people. Jesus is the head of the body, perfecting all who trust and obey Him. We need each other. The idea of starting a home study shows that you are getting answers to your prayers and the conviction of the need to be around other believers. I thank God for this forum, as it has helped me tremendously in my personal walk and growth. I do not say too much on here, but was compelled to strengthen my brother as I went through the same fiery trial. The wisdom of the others who posted here was helpful to me and I hope it is helpful to you.
In closing, just remember we have the world, the flesh and the devil to overcome through Jesus Christ our Lord who reminds us we can do all things through Him. You will find that your desires are changing as God answers your prayers and honors your request to make Him your first priority. You may find as time goes on, some of your interests will come back to you in an enjoyable way, it is just the discipline of growing is tough (but needful) and strongholds must needs be broken for spirital advancment. I hope this helps, know that I am praying for you, and may the Mercy, Grace and Peace of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ be muliplied unto you and yours!
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"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven."
#13
Posted 05 May 2013 - 05:04 AM
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