3 replies to this topic

[Kathy Butler]

My husband of seven years and I are separating and we could use your prayers. I have a history of bad relationships and I am currently running head on into another failure and don’t know how to stop it. My husband is not a spiritual leader in our home and it is causing me continued problems/concerns. My children are grown and out of college and I am seriously struggling with finding a real purpose in life - one centered on God and His purpose for me. I love GOD with all my heart and have been talking with God asking for forgiveness, direction, and His continued love. I feel His presence in my life even though my life and actions are a disappointment to both myself and people I care about and more importantly to Him. There is so much more to share... but really I ask that you just lift my husband and I up in prayer. Especially him since he is hurting - I receive strength from God but he is alone. Thank you.

[Patricia Whalen]

My husband of seven years and I are separating and we could use your prayers. I have a history of bad relationships and I am currently running head on into another failure and don’t know how to stop it. My husband is not a spiritual leader in our home and it is causing me continued problems/concerns. My children are grown and out of college and I am seriously struggling with finding a real purpose in life - one centered on God and His purpose for me. I love GOD with all my heart and have been talking with God asking for forgiveness, direction, and His continued love. I feel His presence in my life even though my life and actions are a disappointment to both myself and people I care about and more importantly to Him. There is so much more to share... but really I ask that you just lift my husband and I up in prayer. Especially him since he is hurting - I receive strength from God but he is alone. Thank you.

I just wanted to assure you of my prayers - what a heartache! I will be praying that through this difficult time Jesus himself will minister to both your hearts and both you and your husband will find strength, peace and faith through our Savior and Lord - Jesus. I have come to understand that it is in the hard places when I can't do anything but cry out to Him that he wraps his loving arms around me and shows me the way that he wants me to go - He will do the same for you!

[JoAnn M]

Kathy: This must be a difficult time for you and I will be praying for you and your husband. I want to be careful here to make sure it is understood that I am not being judgmental about this only trying to respond to a couple of things you have said. What I say I am seeking to say in love not 'holier than thou' arrogance. I am not perfect, far, far from it so I can not remove the speck from your eye but perhaps I can give you something to consider. When you say you are seeking God's will for your life right now it is important to remember that divorce is not God's will. I realize that this is not entirely in your control and that there are situations where it is dangerous to stay together. That said - as much as it is in your control, is there anything you can do to try to heal your marriage? Can you take an honest look at your part in why it has failed and work on yourself rather than trying to change him? A counselor can be very helpful with this. You mentioned that he is not that spiritual leader of the house. The first question is is he a Christian? Obviously he can not be the leader spiritually if he isn't. If he isn't, is he open to the gospel? Jesus is the great Healer.
If he is, then my question to you, for you to bring to the Lord is, "are you allowing him to be the spiritual head?" If yours is the stronger personality is it possible there isn't room for him to take the leadership role. I ask because I am a very strong dominant personality and submitting to God is a struggle for me much less submitting to imperfect humans beings that God brings into my life. If this is true for you then perhaps you need to step back and let him take control, encouraging him and letting him lead even if he doesn't do things that way you think they should be or even if you know it isn't the best way. Focus on the Family has had some excellent discussions on marriage and leadership and submission. If you want to try to save the marriage perhaps you could contact them and ask what resources they have that could help you and your husband. Their website is www.focusonthefamily.com/

I will pray for you for wisdom and strength and healing for the hurt you and your husband are experiencing. This is a difficult thing to go through. I echo the words of Paul in his letter to the Ephesians -
Eph 3:14-21 "For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen."