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Thirsty, hungry and depressed


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#1 thirstydeer

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Posted 24 September 2010 - 11:09 PM

I came across this website after doing a search on A W Tozer.

He seems to be one of the very very few preachers I've come across who talk about REALLY experiencing
God.. actually have experiential knowledge of Him. This seems to be a rare thing from what I have seen.

I DO see low level christianity and alot of people who claim to know God. Really? :-/

I'm hungry & thirsty for God (only He can satisfy and all of our longings are really just longings for Him)
but I'm also depressed because God feels a million - lets make that a billion - miles away.

I REALLY want to know God as much as any person can.. I say with Moses .. God show me your glory.. but I just end up depressed.. angry and frustrated because I can't get God and I can't get satisfied. Hence, reaching for a chocolate bar or some other food or drink to fill the gap. Ugh.

I feel left in this world to struggle on.. one person signed a email to me with "in christ's pure love"
I keep going over that in my head. Does anyone love LIKE that? Not many if any.

Depressed Deer.

#2 Revdavid

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Posted 25 September 2010 - 05:04 AM

Depressed deer. You are in the best place ever. Though my post which you read was about being in a funk; that is not how it is most days. The days I'm seeking the Lord are filled with joy and peace. so keep longing, thirsting seeking and Jesus will not fail you. Read John Chapter 4 and John 6 One about thirst and One hunger. Keep searching. Pastor Tozer's writing is great and it has helped me a great deal. Hope God has intoduced us to grow together.
In Christ our Healer,
Pastor David

#3 Travis Richey

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Posted 25 September 2010 - 06:22 AM

I too came across this website while doing a search on Tozer. My wife bought me "The Pursuit of God" which I've now read through in depth a couple of times. I enjoy the daily devotional from Tozer's writings.

I believe we all go through dry times, times of seeking and searching, and times when we feel the heavens are made of brass and our prayers just bounce off and don't go anywhere. I've heard those times described as times of testing, as times of faith building, and other "times of". But the fact remains, that they seem to happen to everyone, no matter the depth of their relationship with the Lord. There will be times in the valleys, and there will be times on the mountain....and there will be times that both happen at the same time.

Our Lord's Word to us is "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled." May you be fully Blessed as you hunger and thirst.

#4 Brian Rushfeldt

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Posted 25 September 2010 - 07:21 AM

Hi,

Are you involved in any ministry ?

I ask that because I find that when I am doing what I think God asks of me that is when I know/hear/experience Him best. I have a wonderful very non- traditional job(ministry) where I get to meet and minister to Canadians all over our country. And I am an elder in our church and when I get to pray for others - that is soooooo often when God uses me - feeds me and ministers back to me. I am always humbled by that.

Giving out does open me up for that amazing filling.
hope this helps.

#5 thirstydeer

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Posted 25 September 2010 - 02:37 PM

We (my husband and I) felt God calling us out of the church we were attending. That was about a year ago.
I don't know if I believe in traditional church anymore.

I find friends get busy and have little if any time to fellowship. So it's just me and God or rather
just me. Well, thats what it feels like.

Yes there are mountains (or so i've heard) and valleys but I always have been (and maybe always will be)
in the valley. I listen to tozer preach on my mp3 player and brought the best of tozer volumn 1. That is the only thing I'm really doing at the moment. He seems to know what I want and what I want to experience.

Thankyou all for your replies

#6 Lori Smith

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Posted 28 September 2010 - 03:27 PM

I appreciate your post. I have struggled with this issue for a long time. I am like a deer desperate for more of Jesus. Tozer was the same way; however, he allowed himself to be filled for he allowed himself to dwell and to drink.

I often get caught up with guilt; guilt because I just want to sit and talk to Jesus. The church always wants to plug me in somewhere, but when they do, I feel like they are stripping me away from God. God talks to me and fellowships with me, but I always feel like the church does not allow me to sit and hear what He is telling me.

Tozer, on the other hand spent five hours a day praying. He spent time with God everyday. When I do that I feel so guilty. Yet, it is when I do that that I produce fruit. Suddenly, I have joy, I have peace, and I am able to minister to others. I do love to minister to others; however that is not my target. I love God, and He fills me and then He ministers through me to others. Then He gets the glory.

I feel like I am rambling, but you have spoken to the most broken place of my heart, and I appreciate you for bringing it up. I just want to be free to worship with my whole heart without feeling guilty for doing so. I do help others-I help them more when my focus is on Jesus; but, it is Jesus I am so in love with. People come second. Isn't that how it is supposed to be? Love God, love people?

To sum up: You can get close to Him if you take the time to seek Him. That is what Tozer did, and Tozer produced much fruit with his life. Praise music helps, Tozer's books help. But, you know what helps the most? It helps when you realize that Jesus desires you more than you desire Him. Many think it is holy to say that God does not love us; but, as Tozer would say, "that is such a lie." God is passionate about us, deeply passionate about us.

Thanks for listening. Be blessed.
In The Pursuit of God, A. W. Tozer writes, "Jesus taught that He wrought His works by always keeping His inward eyes upon His Father. His power lay in His continuous look at God (John 5:19-21)."

#7 thirstydeer

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Posted 29 September 2010 - 12:57 PM

I appreciate your post. I have struggled with this issue for a long time. I am like a deer desperate for more of Jesus. Tozer was the same way; however, he allowed himself to be filled for he allowed himself to dwell and to drink.

I often get caught up with guilt; guilt because I just want to sit and talk to Jesus. The church always wants to plug me in somewhere, but when they do, I feel like they are stripping me away from God. God talks to me and fellowships with me, but I always feel like the church does not allow me to sit and hear what He is telling me.

Tozer, on the other hand spent five hours a day praying. He spent time with God everyday. When I do that I feel so guilty. Yet, it is when I do that that I produce fruit. Suddenly, I have joy, I have peace, and I am able to minister to others. I do love to minister to others; however that is not my target. I love God, and He fills me and then He ministers through me to others. Then He gets the glory.

I feel like I am rambling, but you have spoken to the most broken place of my heart, and I appreciate you for bringing it up. I just want to be free to worship with my whole heart without feeling guilty for doing so. I do help others-I help them more when my focus is on Jesus; but, it is Jesus I am so in love with. People come second. Isn't that how it is supposed to be? Love God, love people?

To sum up: You can get close to Him if you take the time to seek Him. That is what Tozer did, and Tozer produced much fruit with his life. Praise music helps, Tozer's books help. But, you know what helps the most? It helps when you realize that Jesus desires you more than you desire Him. Many think it is holy to say that God does not love us; but, as Tozer would say, "that is such a lie." God is passionate about us, deeply passionate about us.

Thanks for listening. Be blessed.


I don't think you should feel guilty for wanting to spend so much time with God. It is better to spend 5 hours with God in prayer and one hour in ministry than to spend 5 hours in ministry and one hour with God. How much time people spend in ministry and church will depend on God. Not everyone will spend the same amount of time. And if people judge you for that then they are really only judging God (assuming the person is listening to God and being obedient about where they spend their time etc)

Life is such a struggle.

#8 Lori Smith

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Posted 29 September 2010 - 06:04 PM

I don't think you should feel guilty for wanting to spend so much time with God. It is better to spend 5 hours with God in prayer and one hour in ministry than to spend 5 hours in ministry and one hour with God. How much time people spend in ministry and church will depend on God. Not everyone will spend the same amount of time. And if people judge you for that then they are really only judging God (assuming the person is listening to God and being obedient about where they spend their time etc)

Life is such a struggle.


Thank you so much for responding! I appreciate your words, and I think they are so true. We are all so different. Martha served and worshipped Jesus with her service and Mary sat at His feet. Both were worshipping Him. I think our world is so stressful, and church often so big, that we have turned our relationships with God into a system rather than simply allowing everyone to be who God created them to be. I'm going to go inside so I can read my new Tozer book, "The Purpose of Man: Designed to Worship." It is an awesome book! Thank you for blessing me today. I'll be praying for you. If God has put a thirst in you for Himself, He has done it for a reason. I think it is hard for us to realize sometimes how this awesome God could be so interested in us. I'm glad He is.
In The Pursuit of God, A. W. Tozer writes, "Jesus taught that He wrought His works by always keeping His inward eyes upon His Father. His power lay in His continuous look at God (John 5:19-21)."