3 replies to this topic

[CHRISTOPHER310]

I know this subject is very hot and loaded. Perhaps too much for me to be posting it here. It is also a subject very close to home and heart for me so I wanted to say something.

Read this young lady’s story. [ http://www.myfoxphilly.com/story/26... ] It’s heart breaking, but a reality for so many people older and younger people than her and their family and friends.

My dad died of terminal lung cancer. He didn’t have the right to die because of the state he lived in. So he suffered in pain and very strong medications that messed with his head. He suffered minute by minute, day after day until his final breath came. His final breath was brutal and painful. He suffered because he didn’t have the legal right not to. My mother was there with him all those days and to the very end. She suffered in her own way too and has these horrible memories of his suffering. A man she loves and these are the memories she has had to have in her day after day, year after year because the legal system didn’t allow him to die with dignity or peace. The legal system failed horribly in this case. My family also watched my dad die and they suffered as well. My aunt, my uncle, my grandma-in-law, a close friend of mine all died in similar fashions and suffer for the same stupid, idiotic reason my dad did. The legal system did not give them the right to die as they felt fit to given they were terminally ill with no realistic chance of suffering beyond the pain and suffering for the short time they had left. It’s wrong.

To say to someone that they can not die as they feel fit to and thus have to suffer so horribly and prolong and have their love ones see and remember that is wrong. Been there more than once and have yet to see where it’s right to deny the right to die of the terminally ill. I know there is a lot of debate and people say that no one should take their life’s, even the terminally ill, but I say bull. Watch someone you love suffer to horribly for so long until their final moments come and say what then? That the quality of life ( the suffering ) was worth the denial of the right to die for terminally ill? Watch it happen with more than one as I have and say what? At least their death was legal. Was morally correct. Say what to justify such unnecessary suffering of a human being, a love one.

I am a Christian and understand this issue with in the faith, but I also believe that there is some consideration and grace to those who are terminally ill and suffering. I am ‘Pro Right To Die’ because I know what it’s like not to be.

Sorry about this post. It was a rant because this young lady’s story brought up some very deep and painful emotions I try not to feel.

[Candice]

Christopher,

I'm sorry your father suffered terribly. That is very difficult to watch and feel powerless to really help.

I work for a hospice agency. I know, on a daily basis, that people suffer from cancer, heart problems and many other painful terminal illnesses. However, I contend that we don't have a right to end it all by our own hands or the hands of a hired person. No one said this life would be easy and the end of it is just the same.

This life (and the last days of it) are that of the span of a gnat. I know the Lord comforts His own and that the pain suffered is hard. I think Christ knows that. I take comfort that He endured the most painful punishment (in innocence) and endured because of His Father's love.

I know...I know it is tempting. I think we have the Lord's approval to refuse treatment, etc.

Candice

[Julie Daube]

This is a very sensitive topic, which is why I took so long to put my thoughts together before responding. Just recently, I was watching my mother-in-law suffer horribly, to the point that she said she didn't want to live like that anymore. I was one of her caregivers, and I spent hours sitting by her side as she moaned in pain or just sat in a listless fog. She had been in the hospital for a week, fighting for her life from emphysema/CPOD, congestive heart failure, and kidney failure. Now that she was home, she begged my husband and I never to take her back to a hospital no matter how serious her condition got. We weren't sure what to do, as we were barely capable of caring for her in her weakened state (the stress was so hard on my husband, it landed him in the hospital a week later). If Mom had another health crisis, we thought we might have no choice but to call the paramedics again.

The Lord intervened by helping us get her into an in-home hospice care program. I cannot overemphasize what a God-send this has been. I believe hospice care is the perfect solution to a situation where a person is terminally or critically ill and does not want to use heroic means to extend their life. Instead of using aggressive treatment, a hospice will seek to make the patient as comfortable as possible. They will not take any action to hasten death, but will respect DNRs and will never call 911 if the patient's condition becomes more serious. Instead, they will manage the symptoms at home or at the hospice center.

As I shared in another forum, Mom made a remarkable turnaround once the hospice team stepped in. Her appetite returned, her spirits got better, and she's been growing stronger day by day. I have seen firsthand how hospice care enhances quality of life and dignity for terminal/critically ill patients and eases their suffering. I would recommend it in a heartbeat.

As for the right to die, I don't believe it's my place to judge someone who chooses to end their life because they are suffering. I believe we need to show great grace and sensitivity to anyone in such a situation (both the patient and the caregivers). But like Candice, I can't help thinking of Jesus and the horrible agony He suffered for us. I believe that what Jesus went through on the cross sanctifies some types of suffering. The Bible even says we should count it a privilege to share in His sufferings. I also agree with Candice that God would allow us to refuse treatment.

Three weeks ago, my mother-in-law was suffering so terribly that she wanted to die. Today, she continues to improve and is excited about seeing her daughter on Thanksgiving. It seems that God had a bigger plan than we imagined (at one point, we didn't think she would make it through the night and were praying for God to take her home). I guess the bottom line is that our times are in His hands (Psalm 31:15).

Christopher, I hope that my response did not offend you or cause you any pain.

Blessings,

Julie

[CHRISTOPHER310]

Thank you both for your replies and insights. It does help me alot. I had some old feelings come up as a result of this young ladies situation and I find it very helpful if I talk and share. I am still not settled from this issue, but your replies has brought me comfort. Thanks.